April Poet and Poem of the Month

Winning Poem:

Help Wanted: Poet

Maybe you’re one of those millions of guys

who try to spill out your emotions through poetry

and think poetry has your heart, soul and life.

Maybe you want to produce a positive change in people

and in society as a whole.

Maybe you were born with a quirky nervous system

and suffered heartbreak and loss.

So you must be heard, understood and admired.

Or you think you’ll die if you are forbidden to write words,

and you did not choose poetry, it chose you.

Besides you’re useless with hammer, textbook and actions of the common man.

Or you simply love the feel of the pen in your hand,

the way ink marks a page, along with drops of blood.

Look, anyone can be a poet.

Just come up with words.

Poetry is nothing but the truth

of a person fabricated by words.

And every poem is a translation,

more or less a failure.

Similarly anyone can play baseball.

Just pick up a bat and ball.

But, realize, even the best high school players

will strike out against the pro pitchers.

At this job, you must identify target audiences

and execute strategies to engage said audiences.

Even so, you’ll create content probably no one will understand,

care about or see.

Expect lots of rejection, little or no pay,

plenty of time to mope, to wander, to wonder

or stare off with indifference into the distance.

Perhaps you were trained as a poet.

You learned iambic pentameter, obscure language,

alliteration, metaphor and earned a degree.

You bought yourself time to write but earned nothing as a poet.

So you became a poetry professor to help other also-rans

learn poetry and also earn no money.

Or perhaps when you were fifteen

you thought school sucks, life isn’t fair,

you don’t want to be here,

you’re desperate for words of warning, hope or inspiration.

At any rate, you managed to get through our strict screening process.

So you have adequate virtuosity with words.

You can truly see and clearly understand.

You know each poem creates its own rules

and how to be consistent within those rules.

I’ll tell you a little about myself.

I grew up in the springs of Aganippe and Hippocrene.

My first hires were soothsayers, propagandists and historians.

Dante fell in love with me when we were both nine.

I led him through hell to his beatific vision.

I was married to another man

when Petrarch first noticed me in church.

He wrote 366 sonnets to me,

both as deity and temptress.

I inspired Shakespeare

though I was unfaithful and gushed bad breath.

My breasts and the soft music

jewels made against my bare black body

ravished Baudelaire.

If I hire you, you’ll get a laurel, a distinct voice and guidance.

You’ll get special knowledge exerted directly on your mind or soul.

Did I mention you’d also enjoy a dog park and a nap room?

Yes, it’s just beyond the Ping-Pong tables.

If hired, you’ll think about poetry every day.

You’ll really love writing.

Whether it’s poetry or not will not be for you to decide.

You may actually have no success at all.

Be advised that poets with diverse backgrounds

were particularly encouraged to apply.

And if you don’t work out, it’s no biggie.

I’ve kissed frogs that gave me warts.

Plus, there’s plenty more from where you came from.

I only ask you leave something of value for the next guy.

OK, let’s set aside formalities

and focus on the essentials.

Tell me. Sell me. Cast a spell on me.

Why I should hire you?

Your time is up. On your way out, pay attention

to the great bell, which tolls,

whether rung or not.